SANTA CLAUS AND THE ICE CREAM BUNNY (1972)

SANTA CLAUS AND THE ICE CREAM BUNNY (1972)

“Santa's sleigh is stuck in the sand on a Florida beach only days before Christmas Eve. A group of children try to help.”

Tell me something. When you watch a movie called Santa and the Ice Cream Bunny, do you expect to see Jack and The Beanstalk? No? Well, then, skip this movie, because that's what it is. Oh, sure. There's a good 20 mins of Santa getting stuck in Florida. But then, it's Jack and The Beanstalk for an hour, and then they wrap up with The Ice Cream Bunny saving Santa on a firetruck. What, is he gonna drive Santa to the airport?

Santa psychically calls for some children to help him. But, they all fail because they can't push the animals up to Santa's sleigh. Fearing the children are disheartened, Santa tells them all the story of Jack And The Beanstalk. Honestly, it's pretty basic stuff, with some musicals thrown in. If you were expecting a weird Christmas movie like I was, you'll be disappointed.

All the children sing terribly off-key even when dubbed over. Worse yet, they still include noises like Santa's workshop, and firetruck sirens over the kids' singing. The only good singer is the giant. He sings “Fee Fie Fo Fum” like an old opera singer. But then, the warbly low-budget 1970s audio ruins his spoken dialogue, which he always shouts at the top of his lungs. I get it, he's a giant, but spare me the microphone feedback.

In conclusion, skip this movie. Even if you just want a weird Christmas musical, this isn't it. It's Jack and The Beanstalk pretending to be a Christmas movie. It's like someone had a neat bunny costume, and wanted to put it in a movie, so they just crammed it into another movie. It's not even particularly weird. Just disappointing. It's free on Tubi, if you dare.

X-MEN X-MAS PART 2: THE RETURN OF CIVIL RIGHTS

X-MEN X-MAS PART 2: THE RETURN OF CIVIL RIGHTS

Well, I hope everyone had a Merry Christmas (or holiday)! As usual, I was back in Athens. I got many gifts to do with the X-men! Particularly, I had wanted X-men comics/graphic novels that dealt with Civil Rights issues. To my surprise they were all done by the best modern X-men writers! Mark Millar (Ultimate X-men) and Joss Whedon (Gifted). I guess my parents’ overheard me in the bookstore. I didn’t really want any of that stuff to do with civil wars and vampires. Back to the roots for me!
   I’ve been trying to get my reviews up on AbleGamers, starting with my X-men review. Videogames are a whole new venue of advocacy for me. It’s quite fun. Any social changes we affect as advocates, will have to effect all new forms of media. In particular, these new motion controls make things inaccessible for mobility impaired gamers. But, I’ve accepted that this is just a stage that videogames are going through, like memory cards in the late 1990s, early 2000s. I predict motion control will be replaced by touch screens. Though touch screens have their own issues, it’s still better than disenfranchising 33 million disabled gamers who may not have full mobility: Thanks to AbleGamers for that statistic.
   Speaking of accessibility in the media, prepare for more reports from me on OSU’s Cartoon Library. I realize there’s a whole lot of comics and such there, but many are available by appointment only: including all the X-men. So, as fueled by nostalgia and social justice as I am, I grabbed a copy of MAD magazine, spoofing the Twilight Saga (that was pretty funny.) I also sense Twilight is responsible for the X-men’s turn turning vampires and demons, and supernatural romance, when it really should be about Civil Rights. (Yes, I know Joss Whedon did Buffy the Vampire Slayer; but thus far he hasn’t brought it into X-men.) A huge concern for me is what these media are saying that people should pursue.
That’s why in Hollywood right now, it’s sort of epic monsters vs. epic heroes. Are we more interested in self-preservation than justice? Now, I realize the driving force in Hollywood is money; but, it will be interesting to see where these myths go. I can remember watching the 3rd X-men installment with vague disappointment as characters were killed needlessly, and the movie made odd winks to Internet Culture, concluding with a lackluster “showdown” with only a teaser of a sentinel’s head in sight! Hollywood thought it gave people what it wanted, but it backfired. A good sign that the audience still has power.
   Fortunately, for every X-men 3, you have The Avengers movie; good superhero epics. It will be interesting to see if this decade gives us another Lord of The Rings-type trilogy in The Hobbit, for example, or if this will be considered just a re-hash. I’m going to see The Hobbit tonight, so we’ll see what I think of it.  In the meantime, I hope everyone’s holiday was good, and regenerative and a sign of good times to come!

                                         (Enjoy this video of one of the graphic novels I got!)

X-Mas With The X-Men

X-mas with The X-Men:

To me, there are no better advocates of disability rights in the superhero world than the X-Men. In the real world, it would be places like VSA and independent living organizations, but probably my first experience with my own advocacy was through X-Men. So, instead of looking at doomsday scenarios, I wanted to pay tribute to my first superheroes on the holidays.

There were a couple holidays episodes of at least two animated series. The one in the 90s (Have Yourself A Morlock Little X-Mas.) and the 00s series X-Men: Evolution. Which you can watch above. It’s really good, and deals oddly enough, with Angel who saves a disabled woman in the opening scene! The 90s version is a fairly Christmas Carol version of X-Men. Wolverine doesn’t want to help a Morlock (sewer mutant.) who stole some food, but Professor X invites him to eat with the X-Men. Wolverine sort of plays Scrooge.

But, it’s the X-Men: Evolution episode that really speaks to me, as far as holiday specials go. It stays true to the X-Men themes of fighting for equality even though people may fear and hate others. Plus, there are two disabled people in this episode! Check out Professor X’s wheelchairs between the series! I remember when I was a kid I wanted a hover chair like the 90s version. But, I particularly like the modern power chair design with the Xs in the spokes. Looks comfy.

If you watched that episode, let me know what you thought. To me, it brings up an all too important issue of labeling. Angel’s good actions are first attributed to his mutations (being an “angel”.) then people hate him because of it. So it goes. But, neither is actually true. He’s not an angel from heaven, and he’s not a freak. He’s a good person. But, he’s fighting labels. This is the first episode to show Kitty Pryde as Jewish, and (to my knowledge.) Cyclops as Christian. In this respect, it’s also more diverse than its 90s counterpart.

Personally, I always thought the X-Men were about Civil Rights. And that’s important, because it means that the X-Men want equality; just like we in the disability rights movement do. Our special abilities are what define us, yet we want no special treatment. Our Xavier’s Institutes might well be places like VSA or independent living centers where we learn to use our gifts to benefit others. A big thank you to VSA, which I know always encourages using our gifts. And I love giving people gifts. Especially on X-mas! Happy holidays everyone, and don’t forget to comment on the episode!