Star Trek Continues Episode 3 “Fairest of Them All” Review:

Star Trek Continues Episode 3 “Fairest of Them All” Review:

“Space…the final conquest.”

 -  Evil Kirk’s intro.

      I enjoyed Star Trek Continues third episode “Fairest of Them All”. First, I liked that it was set directly after “Mirror, Mirror” in Star Trek TOS. It even begins with Good Kirk’s iconic speech to Mirror Spock about the illogic of tyranny. I like that the episode is set in The Mirror Universe, and I love Vic Mignogna as Good Kirk/Evil Kirk! (He’s just a great Captain Kirk!) But, that’s where I think the episode loses focus. I think the focus should’ve been on Evil Kirk’s command, and perhaps Spock’s sacrifice in the name of logic/democracy.

Rather than this, Evil Kirk (Who is every bit the great commander Captain Kirk is, only evil.) is thwarted at every turn during Spock’s realization that empire can’t endure. Firstly, I call bologna on that! Even if Spock believed in democracy, there’s no way he could’ve assimilated all of Good Kirk’s philosophy in that one speech, beyond: “In every revolution there is one man with a vision.” Even for Star Trek, I feel that Spock’s stubborn insistence on Good Kirk’s logic disregards his friendship with long friendship with Kirk, and comes across as heavy-handed. Evil Kirk even  says as much, though through different, more passionate words: Spock’s willing to throw everything away on the words of a stranger, and in the end will probably be hunted down.

Now, the real fun comes from watching Vic Mignogna as Evil Kirk, in my view. Spock’s refusal to follow him, and his eventual mutiny sends him into MADNESS. Kirk loves his ship, and he’s not about to let anyone take it from him, or disobey his imperial orders. I love whenever he flips out on his crew. There’s a real human element to Evil Kirk, with as much passion for command as his counterpart.  Beyond this, he feels betrayed by his friend. Yes, maybe the empire is evil, but it is human! He still doesn’t want to lose his friend, but almost kills him in a rage.

Another thing I didn’t like about the episode (Although it looked great!) was how many people joined Spock’s cause just after hearing about it! The empire is still in power, and one crew isn’t likely to make a difference. One man, yes! As Good Kirk says. It might’ve been more effective had Spock made a sacrifice to get them to think about democracy. But, what is one ship to the empire? It likely won’t end well. I would’ve liked to see a couple scenes worked differently so that Spock makes a sacrifice in the name of democracy, rather than a black and white “Good always wins, Evil always loses.” characterization.

Okay, but even if you want to say “That’s how they would’ve done it in the ‘60s.” there’s still one more scene that really bothered me, and that I thought was against the spirit of Star Trek. In this Mirror Universe, counselor MeKennah is seen in bed with Sulu, covered by a sheet. In TOS, all romantic interludes were “signified” by cutaway. I don’t think they ever would’ve allowed partial nudity from women. Not only that but I felt it didn’t really tell me a lot about Mirror McKennah, and I was looking forward to seeing her character be evil. But, here she’s just being cute. McKennah is worth more than that, and I feel the whole scene was just a distraction from the spirit of Star Trek: The Original Series.

So, I guess it all comes down to no one in this Mirror Universe was evil. In fact, the only one who tried to be Evil, in a Mirror Universe built on Evil, was Mirror Kirk, who was betrayed and thwarted by his best friend at every possible turn. Remember, Trekkies, Mirror Kirk’s only experience with the Good Universe was being arrested by Spock. He has no idea what this crazy “Good Captain” could’ve said to Spock to make him mutiny. And he certainly didn’t experience kindness. All he knew was that the counterparts took away his power, and now they’ve gotten to his best friend.

Star Trek TOS had investigated the redeeming qualities of evil before, as well as mankind’s dual nature. Think “Space Seed”, think “The Enemy Within”! Even "Obsession"! While I loved the look of this episode, and I will always love Vic Mignogna for bringing back Kirk and crew, this episode deserved more than the black and white “Good guys win, bad guys lose” approach it received. But, there is a brilliantly captivating portrayal of Evil Captain Kirk’s descent into madness by Vic Mignogna! Overall, I give the episode 3/5 stars!

You can watch it here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dJf2ovQtI6w

Star Trek Continues: “Pilgrim of Eternity” (2014) Review:

Star Trek Continues: “Pilgrim of Eternity” (2014) Review:

“Humanity never loved you…! Humanity feared you!”

- Captain Kirk to Apollo 

I love Star Trek: The Original Series. Even though the special effects are somewhat primitive, the stories and the crew are great. That’s why I’m excited about Star Trek Continues. An effort by producer/actor Vic Mignogna (Voice of Edward Elric on Full Metal Alchemist!) to complete the original five-year mission. Mignogna himself plays Captain Kirk, and looks just like a young William Shatner. Also, Grant Imahara of Mythbusters fame plays Sulu. Chris Doohan takes over his father’s role (James Doohan) and plays Scotty. And the first story we have from the series is the expertly told “Pilgrim of Eternity”, which stars Michael Forest returning as Apollo almost 50 years after “Who Mourns For Adonis?” in 1968!

The show starts off with Captain Kirk in the Wild West, but then Scotty says, “Computer, freeze program!” suggesting of course that Scotty helped create another Star Trek staple: The Holodeck. After this, the crew encounters a strange meteorite which houses the last of the Old Greek Gods. Apollo is beamed abroad, but he is old. He asks for asylum.

Despite this, his “god organ” discovered last time they met, that converts worship into power, seems to be reeking havoc on the ship and crew. Scotty is extremely distrustful of Apollo in particular, due to Apollo courting his old flame Caroline years ago. It takes no time at all for Apollo to have people entranced in the rec room, and demanding worship from the crew. He hurls Captain Kirk across the hall, and knocks out Uhura at her computer. Vic twists and contorts dramatically while levitating, and in Captain Kirk style…(above!) he denounces Apollo’s worship!

Eventually, Apollo apologizes and Captain Kirk takes his word as sincere. Apollo elects (With McCoy’s help!) to have surgery where he can have the organ safely removed. He still has his powers, but he’ll no longer need worship. In a final act of self-sacrifice he revives Uhura. Having thus demonstrated that he is beyond the need for worship, Kirk drops him off on a planet with equivalent 14th century technology, where he can help.

Along with this superbly acted story, there is one unique addition to the crew. Lt. McKenna comes abroad as the ship’s psychologist, who is instrumental in ascertaining that Apollo is telling the truth. Also, a funny scene occurs when she walks in the Captain’s quarters and is greeted by a shirtless Captain Kirk. Vic Mignogna also has nearly the exact same physique as the young Shatner…ladies.

Typically, I’m not a fan of fanmade Star Trek…except in books! Because it all looks so cheesy. And I count TAS as canon, so if each season was a year…the five-year mission was complete! But, these guys do a wonderful job! It’s so good, it doesn’t look fanmade. I can’t ignore a new series as good as this! Plus, it means the same guy who plays Captain Kirk also voiced another hero of mine…Ed Elric! So, he’s not only my favorite Alchemist, but also now, my favorite Captain! (With all due respect to Captain Picard.)

I’m really looking forward to the next episode of Star Trek Continues. It really shows what Star Trek: TOS could’ve been, if it had big studio support (In fact, we almost never got a 3rd season of Star Trek.) and more money for effects. And it tells great stories. The message of “Pilgrim of Eternity” is quite clear, and in line with Roddenberry’s vision: Self-sacrifice is better than worship. Spock (Todd Haberkorn) is sort of underplayed in this episode, but true to the show, he exchanges conclusive banter with Kirk and McCoy on the bridge. You can watch Star Trek Continues (and it’s second episode: “Lolani”!) for free online now!

Episodes link: http://www.startrekcontinues.com/episodes/#.UvkI-GJdXfg

Halo: Fall of Reach: Covenant Review (2011)

Halo: Fall of Reach: Covenant Review (2011)

Kelly: If we miss…

Sam: “We’re Spartans, Kelly. We don‘t miss.” 

So, I was sitting in Barnes & Noble a couple days ago, and decided to grab a random graphic novel to keep me occupied. That graphic novel was "Covenant"…which is a Halo comic. I’ll be lenient on this one since I’ve only ever played Halo about twice, and that was when it was new. But hey, I even reviewed Super Metroid, so how hard could this be?  Today’s review is the long-winded  Halo: Fall of Reach: Covenant, graphic novel from Marvel Comics!

     The graphic novel seems to follow the UNSC around, first the fleet, then the Spartans (Which are like Super Marines I guess.) and then the grunts, as they all battle the Covenant, which are weird looking aliens crossed between a Muppet and a bug from Starship Troopers. One of the things I find hilarious about Halo is how outmatched the Covenant seems to be, and yet the UNSC constantly acts like they’re a threat.

    In the first chapter, there’s a lot of techno babble about some secret weapon they have but: “They will counterattack, and we will be destroyed.” So, maybe not such a good plan then? After the fleet gets destroyed, then they call in the Spartans, and unveil…sigh…the Mjonir battle suits at a base called Damascus. They really grabbed for mythology there. I have no problem with mythology, but it’s not a madlib, okay? They should have reasons behind the names.

Anyway, in the second chapter it’s all about the Spartans: Three Spartans Jeff, Sam, and Kelly have to land on this Covenant ship and blow it up. At least, in this part we actually get to see the Covenant, and it’s hilarious. One of the Spartans gets trapped as he sets the explosive, and sacrifices himself so that the others survive. One of the things I liked about this sections was, for all its madlib mythology, they explain that the armor triples their strength, and in normal test subjects the suit reacted so quickly it broke their bones. Spartans, however, are not normal test subjects.

   Really? And I thought I was just playing a first-person-shooter! Now, I know that I actually was simulating a hilariously ineffectual military organization that relies on secret plans and test subjects! At least Captain America was one superhero fighting Supernazis, so he has a reason to exist! Here, it’s just Dr. Hadsley takes three random guys to a secret base after their fleet was destroyed and gives them super armor. Can anyone explain this to me other than as a bad parody of Starship Troopers? I’m not kidding…the whole organization seems to be built on secret plans, instead of actual plans.

    The final chapter is the battle of Cote de Azur. I just thought this was badly written. There are scenes where people are saying: “We’re losing men here!” and “This is more than I’ve ever seen in one place!” But, we never actually see much of the battle except for one ship that takes out a jeep. Show, don’t tell! Anyway, I was willing to give Halo a chance. It does describe the mythology for me, but I feel like at the end of the day, it’s just a bland first-person-shooter about a terribly ineffective military organization battling Muppets.

    The Covenant still don’t seem like much of a threat to me. They are bug-Muppets vs. super soldiers with guns! Most of the destruction, as I understand it, was caused by the UNSC’s poor decision-making, and not the alien threat. They sacrificed men, they sacrificed the fleet, and they sacrifice test subjects.

    Just because I’m relatively new to the Halo universe, I’ll rate this one 2.5 out of 5 stars. It does explain the universe (Though it’s poorly shown.) and it seems to be at least a good parody of Starship Troopers. But the illustrator didn’t have much to work with, because scenes were dedicated to people talking about death rather than showing it.

 I feel like Captain Kirk would be really disappointed in the UNSC. And even he would take along some red shirts, but he always had a plan! Oh, well…I suspect within the videogame Halo the secret plan plot exists to make the player feel special. But, as a comic, it just left me in the dark about how this organization can even operate!   Master Chief has nothing on Captain Kirk!
   

AE: Apocalypse Earth (2013)

AE: Apocalypse Earth (2013)

Capt. Sam Crowe: “We protect each other, or we’re all gonna die alone.”

    But wait…so you’ll still die, but not alone? And what does that have to do with “We protect each other?” The sad thing is, if AE weren’t a B-movie low-budget mashup of sci-fi blockbusters like Avatar, Predator, and Star Trek, then it might actually have been good! Okay…not really. The effects and dialogue are horribly cheesy, but in a Syfy movie kind of way. It is after all, a direct-to-DVD thing I found on Netflix.

    Since I’ve been talking about Batman so much on here I wanted to review real sci-fi. Even if it’s Syfy material. AE borrows all the clichés. Earth is destroyed and the refugees have to learn how to survive and get along with the natives while killing their cloaked pursuers, “The Chameleons”. So, it is quite literally Avatar, Predator and Star Trek. To its credit, I felt like it was at least trying to form its own narrative, using familiar settings, which is more than I can say for J.J. Abrahms.

There’s even a Neytiri rip-off (Except she’s green! Haha!) named Lea, who teaches the crew how to survive, and a Data rip-off  named TIM (complete with the “synthetic skin” makeup) who struggles to understand human nature. Except he’s a horrible android actor who stutters occasionally, and can’t maintain flat affect. In addition, he keeps saying he’d be happy to do things, which gets annoying.
 
Oh dear, what else is there to say about this cheesefest? The group slowly encounters natives, and it turns out some humans were being kept by the Chameleons in zoos/laboratories. In one of the cheesiest “syfy” twists I have ever seen, when they reach the natives, it turns out Lea never learned to speak or write her native tongue. TIM mentions that many languages have similar structures, and perhaps he can synthesize a translation matrix. He becomes the interpreter, and the societies unite against the Chameleons!

   The events are standard procedure: First the humans learn to survive, then struggle against death, and then build some communication. Captain Sam Crowe is no doubt an amalgam of Jayne from Firefly and Captain Kirk…he spews hopeful one-liners like Kirk (“We’re not going down without a fight!”) and has the same build and anti-hero persona of Jayne. Plus, the end scene with the attack on The Chameleons with bows and arrows is equal parts Avatar and The Original Series episode Friday’s Child! If you recall, Kirk defeats the Klingon occupiers with a bow and arrow, and help from the natives.

   As bad as the effects and dialogue are, I gotta admit it’s still good to see good old syfy cheese with gunfights, and cheesy morals…even if it is recycled. Hollywood puts so much effort into spectacle these days, I think they forget sci-fi is a window into human social structure, and nature. Although this just mashed three movies together, it was good to see those themes come up again, but the movie never makes you connect with the characters. It never really could anyway, given that this is a cheesefest. And the CGI makes Lake Placid look good.

Overall, I love-hated the movie (if that makes sense!) It had bad acting, stock characters, horrible dialogue, and bad CGI! And yet…I feel there’s something comically noble in the way that it mixes sci-fi action-survival clichés with the questions of human society and nature And who doesn’t like a good syfy gunfight? It’s basically Captain Kirk and Data vs. The Predator!
 
 Admittedly, this movie is getting a bad rating from me. Probably something on the level of E. But, I’d also put it in the so-bad-it’s-good category. The Star Trek fan in me loves the philosophical bits, however badly executed, the syfy fan in me loves the gunfights, and arrows, and action bits. It’s really the bad acting and CGI in-between that hurts. But, at least you can laugh at it! Cliché yes, schlock yes, schmaltzy and low-budget? Yes and yes. And yet, there’s no reason why you shouldn’t give it a watch on Netflix!
   

STAR TREK: SPOCK: REFLECTIONS (2009)

STAR TREK: SPOCK: REFLECTIONS (2009)

“All living beings require illumination and wisdom. And none so much as a child’s mind yearning for insight…that it is unable to find...”

- Old Spock to the Saurian passenger

    Since I reviewed Star Trek: Burden of Knowledge (2010), I figured I can now go back review Star Trek: Spock: Reflections, also by Scott Tipton with art by Fredrica Manfredi. This tells several different stories about Spock’s journey through life, from his school days to teaching on Romulus. These are told through flashbacks which cover important moments in coming to terms with his two-sided nature between logic and emotion.

    We start by a Saurian talking to him about leaving The Romulus-Federation Neutral Zone, and we get a flashback to Captain John Harriman taking over the Enterprise. John shows Spock a plaque he had committed in Kirk’s honor, and tells him that Kirk told him to take risks, if he wanted to sit in the Captain’s chair. Spock remarks that there is no need for ceremony because Kirk was only following his nature. It keeps things simple and logical, as Spock would no doubt have wanted. B- if only for the perfect Spock answer to Harriman.

    While the first story deals with Spock’s need for logic and simplicity, the next is a well-crafted excellent story about Spock’s emotional struggles. Sarek (Spock’s dad) is angry with Spock and goes after him for being out too late in the desert. Young Spock argues that he simply has a different course of logic. From there, on top of a beautiful Vulcan cliff, Spock explains that when he is outside, he feels at peace, and that he knows that him being half-human is a constant reminder to his father that he’s not a Vulcan. Sarek changes the subject and says that he will worry his mother. She is human, after all. And he leads Spock back home. A+ for this beautiful, well-drawn scene!

    Very little is often said about what Spock’s dad actually thinks of Spock’s half-breed nature. Although he tries to stay logical, his emotions interfere too. It’s a beautiful scene. Next, we see Spock with Captain Pike, on a planet too far for transporters to reach. An engineer has developed portable wormholes to make long-term transportation easier. When Spock mentions that wormholes are unstable, he falls in, and Pike saves him in an act of selflessness. It alludes to his later sacrifice without ripping it off exactly from The Wrath of Khan! B for a grade, as far as that story goes, since we’ve already seen it with another Captain.

    Then, we get a flashback to Romulus where he is teaching the ways of logic to some kids. Even though there’s the two-part TNG episode “Unification” (1991), with Spock on Romulus, you don’t actually see him do much teaching, so that was nice. It’s here he learns that James T. Kirk is dead, which is the reason he’s back on the shuttle talking to the Saurian. One thing that happens in-between the next story is that he stops in Vulcan, and meets his former wife. An unnecessary detour, since next I either want to see Kirk or Picard.

And the next story is a Kirk story! It is short and sweet, and set in The Original Series era. A warp core breach threatens the U.S.S. Collins, Jim Kirk beams down to save the elderly female Captain, who won’t leave out of pride. When Spock remarks that he risked much for her, Kirk replies, “Surely, you weren’t worried, Mr. Spock?” (Tipton writes such great Kirk lines!) Bones says don’t be silly…to be worried he’d have to have a heart! I can almost hear the ending theme from The Original Series. Essentially, though it’s a repeat of the virtue of sacrifice with Pike…we don’t have enough info on what Pike would’ve been like…so this is much better. A+!
   
  Finally, there is one last flashback. To Saavik’s Kobayashi Maru. Saavik is disappointed and expresses her annoyance working with humans, and wants to know what she can do. Spock tells her to learn to trust. Although it is illogical. A sweet story, but somewhat incomplete feeling, and I wasn’t exactly clamoring to see Saavik. C+.

     Finally, the end stories (Thankfully not flashbacks.) are Spock reading the death notice, then meeting with Picard. Picard tells Spock he’s welcome back to The Federation at any position, but Spock declines. He notes that he’s served with men of “exemplary character”, but his duties are on Romulus. They exchange Vulcan salutes, and cut to Spock on Romulus happily teaching children. A- . Picard is as dignified as ever, but put in the situation of being shot down by Spock.

Overall, it’s a good book. It just gets bogged down by its own flashback devices. Since many of the virtues that Spock learns in this volume are repeated, particularly from Pike to Kirk, it loses a bit of it’s power. And yet, Captain Kirk is as charming as I’d expect him, and Picard’s Vulcan salute at the end is touching. I remember when I first got this book, I couldn’t put it down. It’s good, if a bit long-winded! The most powerful stories come from the relationships Spock had with these exemplary characters!

   But, since I don’t know a lot about Pike…(other than being disabled later, and played by Jeffrey Hunter in the failed Original Series pilot episode!) or how Spock related to Saavik, or even T’pring, it kind of just feels like melodrama in-between. Which is not to say that it isn’t good! Just feels less powerful…then again, Spock being a Vulcan, maybe that was the point…to drift between feeling and stone cold logic. A-, just for a little excess, but a fun read if you’re trapped between alien worlds like Spock and I! Oh, and the art gallery is just stunning! (No phaser pun intended!)

    Me? Oh, yes! I exist between the able-bodied world and the disabled world. Between what I can and can’t do. The limitlessness of my mind vs. the weight of my body. Although I could never walk, and don’t want to, I walk in my dreams and my words carry my weight, along with my power chair of course! Yes, I think I know what it’s like to be in two worlds! I’m an alien too! Live long and prosper, everybody!
     
 

Star Trek: Burden of Knowledge (2010) Review

 

From the people who wrote and drew Spock: Reflections comes Star Trek: Burden of Knowledge. It’s in the vein of episodes like The Cloud Minders and Friday’s Child, where they beam down to visit a planet and judge it’s willingness to join The Federation. The presence of Arex at the helm tells us that this is in the animated series, presumably during years 4-5 in the five year mission.

   The people of Mygdalus 3 are a highly medically advanced society, and yet they won’t let the crew see their medical techniques, claiming doctor-patient confidentiality. Eventually they are kidnapped and one of the crew (The essential expendable Lieutenant Thompson.) is injured during an attack when the Virtili people (read: Birdmen.) are angry about late medical supplies.

    The writer, Scott Tipton, does a good job mirroring Captain Kirk’s quirky cadence with thoughtful pauses, authoritative exclamations, and metered boldface lettering. But, there are some scene which don’t feel right. For example, after luring the Virtili guards into their cell, and finding a Vulcan neck-pinch ineffective, Kirk responds with a knock-out punch. Anyone with passing knowledge of Kirk Fu knows a neck-chop delivers the knock-out blow.

    Anyway, the two races work out their differences rather swiftly, and return a perfectly-healed Lieutenant Thompson. Kirk praises their peaceful resolution as a cornerstone of Federation values, but Spock is rightly suspicious. There is a subplot which reminds me of The Return of The Archons. This time though, it’s on a planet where people who act and communicate as one body via a “thoughtwork” seek Federation admission.

 When Kirk finds out they act as one body, he says “That’s why you speak so slowly. You’re…UNUSED to verbal communication.” It seems the writer slipped in a Kirk joke. Anyway, whether or not this necessitated a subplot is unclear; but the basic idea is that since their thoughts all work as one, they are unused to individuality, which is key for Federation admission.

     While these days, a “thoughtwork” makes me think of Facebook and the communalization effect of social media, Kirk has always been a champion of individuality even back in the 60s/70s retro-future as seen in battles with Nomad, Landru, and of course, Khan…though I think more Landru here. Anyway, Kirk rejects their proposal for admission and tells them to return when they are ready. There are no exploding computers. Another thing Tipton gets wrong. If there are evil computers, Kirk must make them explode.

    I suppose the point is that time has passed, and to demonstrate that Kirk will turn Federation applicants down if he suspects anything…but we know this. Kirk returns to Mygdalus 3 and uncovers a horrible secret. The healthy Lieutenant Thompson is a clone! All the healthy Mygdalians are clones! After a smashing battle scene where Kirk crashes a medical lab with 200 Thompsons, Kirk rejects Mygdalus 3 from the Federation and quips that Starfleet could use another 200 Lieutenant Thompsons.
 
I mean, I’m divided on how I feel about this graphic novel. Tipton works well with The Animated Series background, and the artwork is often so good the actors’ faces and voices jumped out at me. The way Fredrica Manfredi draws a subtle Captain’s smirk or opens Kirk’s mouth in a moment of revelation is spot-on. It reminds me, at best, of an Animated Series movie, if one was ever made. Still, little moments feel out of place, and while the Animated Series is the perfect setting for weirder aliens, and silly humor…did we really need an entire subplot? And what happened to that planet? That’s the one wormhole in the entire book, but overall, I’ll give it a B!

Star Trek: The Animated Series Reaction

Star Trek: The Animated Series Reaction:

“How come we always end up like this?”

                               

                 - Kirk to Spock after being captured by the natives in “Bem”.           

                                                    

The animated series of Star Trek ran from ‘73-‘74, and had a great Scooby-Doo-like animation style. The animation in this case is meant to explore possibilities that wouldn’t have been possible in the old show. As such, we revisit some characters and locales like Harry Mudd, The Recreation Planet, and Vulcan, which now has towering spires in the desert, and doesn’t just look like California.
   
Also, I enjoyed some of the alien creatures, though many exist to re-hash old themes in the older show. The point of The Ambergris Element is re-hashed from The Cloud Minders. The point of The Survivor is pretty much the same as The Man Trap. But, the true reason you’ll want to watch this series (Apart from seeing the conclusion to the original 5-year-mission.) is the animation itself, which allows the crew to visit strange new worlds.

    There's plenty of far space episodes, an episode on Vulcan, (“Yesteryear”) a "we're all tiny" episode (“The Terratin Incident”) and an underwater episode. The first episode “Beyond The Farthest Star” is particularly effective in showing a vast alien civilization in outer space with the animation. It was written by sci-fi author Samuel Peeples. Other returning writers include D.C. Fontana, David Gerrold, and even in a first, Walter Koenig (Chekov; who wrote a great episode “The Infinite Vulcan”.) The series itself even adds to canon. It’s here in the fantastic episode “Bem” (The crew deals with an alien who can disassemble his body!) that we first learn Captain Kirk’s middle name is Tiberius.

    Despite the fact that the animation is used to good effect and adds incredibly to the “alien” environments of the series, the medium itself has a few pitfalls. For example, it has re-used shots, all the voice actors sound tired, (But, it is the original actors! Legend has it Shatner spoke his lines into a tape recorder while on vacation.) Scotty provides his best impressions for all the other aliens they meet…he even created Lieutenant Arex, the alien navigation officer. But, it is all noticeably James Doohan.

   What I’m saying is, this series deserves another look. It was, in a sense, the first successful re-boot of the classic Star Trek. Which I might add, was able to re-visit episodes, keep the morality of the show, and add to canon! And the animation is something to look at! (It’s Rotoscope, I think. Anyway, it reminds me of Scooby-Doo.) Look, the notion that somehow the animated series isn’t canon is ridiculous. J.J. Abrahms, this is how you re-boot. It has the original actors, some original writers, preserves the morality tale format, and uses the “effects” to explore new alien possibilities, not re-tread old ground. Without the  animated series, we’d have no Star Trek movies, and without those first movies, no Next Generation!

    If you get a chance, you should watch Star Trek: The Animated Series. You can watch all 22 episodes for free on StarTrek.com, or do what I did and watch it on Netflix. After Into Darkness left a bitter taste in my mouth, it was good to see a re-boot that could be faithful to the original series. And it manages to be funny, and adventurous and add to canon! Give it a watch, and visit some alien worlds that finally don’t look like California!  

                                      ("Yesteryear"; Spock neck-pinches a Lamancha on Vulcan.)

(The series adds Arex and M'ress, alien officers.)

                 ("Beyond The Farthest  Star"; The "force-field belt" never caught on in later Trek series.)

MOVIE REVIEW: STAR TREK INTO DARKNESS

Movie Review: Star Trek Into Darkness

   I honestly don’t know what to say about this one. The last Star Trek reboot (2009) started off strong with the story primarily setting new grounds where anything can happen, and Spock embraces emotion a little; Kirk becomes  a little more a captain. It was good. It had originality, it took risks. This one has none of that but some good “tributes” to The Original Series. (By which I mean lines and entire scenes lifted from other episodes.)

 You know how Kirk isn’t the captain yet in the first one? Guess what? He’s demoted again! And we get that same bar scene from the last movie about how Captain Pike still believes in him. Then, he’s called to a meeting about a terrorist who bombed London. Should I say spoilers…? I don’t care. This movie spoils itself. So, the terrorist attacks the meeting Captain Pike (not in a wheelchair.) dies and the Enterprise is given back to Kirk…what? Why demote him then for 10 minutes?

    Kirk is ordered to hunt down this terrorist “John Harrison”. “John Harrison” beams over to the Klingon homeworld where he thinks the Federation can’t touch him. This WOULD be interesting if the movie didn’t drop the legality plot point in favor of Kirk blasting the Klingons in a firefight, in which our terrorist comes to help.

I don’t know. Are the Klingons stupid? Why do they decide not to retaliate against this illegal Federation invasion? It’s a point the movie ITSELF raises! And they drop it! Sure, Uhura tries to talk Klingon with the warriors and appeal to their honor to hand over this Earth criminal, but guess what? The Klingon responds by freaking choking her!

 So, after John Harrison surrenders, what does Kirk do? He punches the guy anyway, and hurts his hand! No glib remark, no authorative stride. Heck, no…moralizing monologue…just punching. There’s no wonder and compassion  to this Kirk: no Shatner charm, I have to say. Look, I’m sure Star Trek 2009 proved that these guys can do good impressions of their characters. Simon Pegg can, yes, speak with a brogue; but he’s just impersonating. But, there wasn’t even an attempt by Kirk to be suave. He was just rude. For Pete’s sake, Kirk was daring yes, but his oratory skills are practically what makes him a good captain.

Kirk doesn't even attempt to communicate. “Risk is our business.” “There are no unknowns.” “Our emotions are part of who we are.” There’s none of that Old Kirk compassion here. There is however a monologue about how much he wants to kill Khan. Watching this movie is like watching Trek with someone who has no idea of what Star Trek is; "HEY! Remember that guy who did the THING AND SAID THE WORDS?" That's this movie. It’s a hodgepodge of context-free Trek references, with all meaningful dialogue replaced by action and jokes. Zachary Quinto as Spock does a good job with what he’s given; but, oh man…it’s not much.
 
So…Surprise! The main villain reveals himself to be Khan once he’s onboard the Enterprise. His backstory seems cool at first, but then he completes a sentence. He was unfrozen from the Eugenics Wars by Admiral Marcus (Also, Carol Marcus is abroad from Wrath of Khan.)   in the event of WAR WITH THE KLINGONS. Argh…so, let’s recap: Kirk invades the Klingon homeworld and then it’s revealed that the man who sent him on a manhunt to get Khan…wanted war in the first place. The Klingons don’t retaliate because…? They forgot? So…why wouldn’t Kirk now be a Federation criminal as well? It’s never explained, and it gets worse. Hang on.

Khan reveals that he put his cryogenetically sealed crew in some emptied out photon torpedoes. I should add that these are the torpedoes Kirk fires Scotty for objecting to earlier in the film. Geez, these new Enterprise crewmembers cannot handle an argument without someone being demoted, fired, or reassigned. Of course, he comes back on the crew and KHAN AND KIRK go after Admiral Marcus, as if Kirk doesn’t know Khan already wants to kill him. Long story short, they beat up Marcus, Khan takes over the U.S.S  Vengeance formerly commanded by Marcus. Khan fires on the Enterprise. I just can’t bring myself to write the next paragraph, but…here goes.

    There’s a warp core malfunction. Spock can’t get away. So after Kirk is menacingly beamed down to die with his ship, Kirk realizes the only thing to do is to…repair the warp core manually. Sigh. But, it’s radiated…and then Scotty calls Spock down to engineering quickly. No, no…they didn’t. Did they just RIP OFF THE MOST POWERFUL SCENE IN WRATH OF KHAN for a lame switcheroo? Just…no! You can’t just make your movie out of other movies! You can borrow elements, but think of your own movie! And to make matters worse…at the end of that scene, where in the original the usually-confident Captain Kirk utters a single hushed “No…” As Spock dies on the other side of the glass…that was powerful. But, what does Spock say now on the other side?

“KHAAANNNN!!!”

Okay, the “tributes” have gone beyond cute. Now, it’s just offensive. Really. I wish I were making this up. I’m not. Spock yells “KHAAANNN!!!” Okay…I think that’s the worst of it. Phew. Oh, one more. Spock calls old Spock and asks “What did you do?” to defeat Khan. So, they load up some photon torpedoes and convince Khan that they contain his crewmates. He beams them abroad and they detonate. So…Dr. McCoy took a blood sample of Khan’s beforehand and injected it into a freaking tribble while figuring out how they work. McCoy revives Kirk with this superhuman-tribble blood. Is this a Star Trek mad lib?  Of this film I can only say this…of all the tropes I have known…these were the most…humorless.

All this film does is remind me how original Star Trek was. And how unoriginal this is. Oh, the effects were good, but it has no story. Literally. Go see the original Wrath of Khan. I’m going to try to Vulcan mind-meld this out of my brain. Such a good setup with Star Trek 2009 and then it boldly went and ripped off Skyfall and Wrath of Khan. So disappointing! I repeat…watch the original…do not watch this movie if you respect Star Trek!