Dungeons and Dragons: Chronicles of Mystara (2013):

Dungeons and Dragons: Chronicles of Mystara (2013):

“Dungeons and Dragons: Chronicles of Mystara is an enhanced re-release of Dungeons and Dragons: Tower of Doom and Dungeons and Dragons: Shadow over Mystara. Besides the obvious differences like gamepad support, leaderboards or internet multiplayer, the most important enhancement is the addition of house rules: after beating the game once, players can activate optional rules like items with infinite durability, the player character heals when killing an enemy or a time attack mode. After solving challenges like killing a certain number of enemies, the player unlocks bonus items like concept drawings. This version also introduces infinite continues and a few additional video modes which simulate things like scanlines or CRT monitors.”

- IMDB Summary

For what it is, Chronicles of Mystara is pretty good. It's a DnD-based beat-em-up. It combines two arcade games. Tower of Doom (1993) and Shadow Over Mystara (1996). There is no real character creation to speak of, only some pre-made characters. Tower of Doom only had Cleric, Fighter, Elf, and Dwarf. Shadow Over Mystara adds Thief and Magic-User (Who, for DnD, should be a given! But, it's a beat-em-up first. Maybe they couldn't decide what spells to put in.)

The Magic-User can use spells, which are basically clear-screen attacks. There's fireball. Acid Cloud, Ice Storm, Magic Missile, among others. Otherwise, it's a pretty basic beat-em-up arcade game with neat ways to use items that sort of resemble classic DnD. Because Elf / Dwarf are classes, and there are no real armor/weapon mechanics, it's sort of a weird mix of 1st Edition and 2nd Edition DnD.

Characters that don't have spells can use items like healing potions, arrows, hammers, burning oil flasks (which create fire walls, which you need for monsters weak against fire.) You need keys to unlock some chests. Sometimes, if your character is strong enough, you can break them open. You can also buy items in shops after some quests. The game also has special loot that can only be collected in-game, and Chronicles of Mystara tracks what items you've found.

Additionally, Chronicles of Mystara has challenges apart from its 2 main games. So, along with keeping track of your items, it can also track unique achievements unlocked. They start simple and get harder, in classic arcade fashion. Everything from play through a game to kill a specific monster 300+ times.

The monster designs are pretty cool. Some look straight out of the Monster Manual. You've got your basic goblins, harpies, kobolds, and gnolls. But, then you've got really specific monsters like Displacer Beasts, Ice Salamanders, and Owlbears, Dark Elves, etc. You need to keep oil on you if you don't have fire spells to defeat Ice Salamanders and trolls (who can only be killed by fire.)

All in all, it's a pretty good DnD-type experience, combining what's great about DnD fantasy with Capcom beat-em-up mechanics. Plus, you get two games in one. Sure, it's not going to replace pen-and-paper 5th or 6th Edition anytime soon. But, it's nice for a classic DnD fix, if you like beat-em-ups. And it's perfect for multi-player! I say check it out.

Broforce: Broforce Forever Update (2023):

Broforce: Broforce Forever Update (2023):

“The free update to the world's most patriotic video game is out now! New Bros! New Baddies! New Challenges! Play the entire campaign again. And again.”

Broforce added some new characters earlier last year. Let's talk about them. Broffy the Vampire Slayer is obviously Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Her special is holy water which can resurrect her if she dies. It also kills demons. But, since I never got to the levels inside Hell, it's not very useful; she throws wooden stakes instead of shooting. The resurrection aspect is neat.

Seth Brodell is Seth Brondell from The Fly. He vomits acid for his attack. The acid is pretty powerful, and can even kill bigger enemies like the Bruiser in one shot. Plus, he can fly for a little bit with a double-jump. He can use teleportation for his special, which is nice to zip around and clear up challenging spots.

Speaking of challenging, Demolition Bro is another Sylvester Stallone character, from Demolition Man. He throws bombs, but not like the McGyver bro, where it automatically just works. No, you have to attack once to throw the bomb, then attack again to detonate it. Thank goodness he's got a standard melee attack. His special's pretty good though: a bomb that freezes everyone around him.

Bro Gummer is Burt Gummer from Tremors. He's got a big high-powered sniper rifle with a nice kick. Honestly, he feels a little overpowered. His special is sniper mode. It's like Brobrocop's special targeting attack, letting you select and take out several enemies. Except Bro Gummer's is way more powerful.

Next up, we have Xebro, Warrior Princess (Xena: Warrior Princess.) She can attack with a sword like Brolander and Broheart. For her special, she throws her chakram. (Her steel boomerang thingy.) It kills everyone around her and returns to her. Also, as with the Mad Max Bro, you can collect multiples of their special attack items. So that's nice!

Desperabro is obviously Antonio Banderas's character from Desperado. He can make enemies dance, by playing the guitar if you stand still. His melee attack is his guitar. He shoots two shotguns. His special is to call in his buddies with a rocket launcher and a machine gun! He has a lot of ways he can be useful. I think he's my favorite of the new bunch.

Of course, Broforce is still fun to play. There were even some minor changes to classic characters like Bronoversial Soldier (Universal Soldier.) He now shoots rapid shots, and his special has been updated to not only a resurrection ability, but also now his special scares nearby enemies, which is helpful.

Well, I just wanted to talk about the new characters. Definitely, my least favorite of the new bunch is Demolition Bro. Which is unfortunate, because that's a great action movie. Regardless, it's still fun to blow everything up and run-and-gun everywhere. It's Broforce's thing. And that's why I can play Broforce: Forever...forever!

Broforce (2015):

Broforce is a pixelated run-and-gun that is an homage to American action movies. Each hero or "Bro" has their own weapons and special abilities. For example, Rambro (Rambo) can throw grenades, while Brommando (Arnold Schwarzenegger's Commando) fires a rocket launcher with a special attack that fires three missiles. My favorite bro is probably the duo pair known as The Boondock Bros (Boondock Saints), because not only do they both have to be killed for you to lose a life, but their special ability is resurrection. That comes in handy because as you progress the game can get really hard.

You start off just blasting terrorists in the jungle, and rescuing Bros. The bro parody names are funny sometimes, but sometimes they don't even try. Bro Hard should be John BroClane for example. But, others are pretty funny like The Brofessional (The Professional) and Brobrocop (Robocop). Honestly, I just like blowing stuff up sometimes. Your goal is to get to the chopper at the end of each level. Except when you just have to kill a boss. Everything around you blows up or is destroyed when you shoot at it. Even that can be pretty fun.

The fun and humor of the game count for a lot. I never did get much farther than the later buzzsaw trap levels. But, the fast pace and ultra-masculine satirical humor of the game is enough to keep me trying. At the end of each level, you have to kill mini-Satan and raise the USA flag for the chopper to come. But, I see that on the last level, Satan turns into his final beast form and throws fireballs that take up the whole screen that you have to run from while shooting at him. Holy cow! Other levels include aliens and underground enemy bases.

You can also design your own levels in the level editor. Mix and match your enemies and power-ups! Create your own obstacles! Screw around and shoot everything. It's a good time.

Ultimately, I think Broforce has enough challenge and fun to make it infinitely replayable. Though some levels are definitely not my favorite, like the Rail Fortress boss. However, once you beat a level, it's always really satisfying to see everything blow up, and hear that victorious heavy metal guitar riff. Try playing Broforce anyway you can. It's a blast whether you're playing solo or with your bros!

Stranded II (PC+Mac 2007): Game Accessibility Review:

Stranded II (PC+Mac 2007): Game Accessibility Review:

Stranded II is a bit like Minecraft. Except Minecraft lets you build whatever world you want piece by piece. Stranded II appears to be the opposite philosophy. Namely, you have to build what it tells you you can build, and you have no idea what you’re getting as you randomly hit trees or the ground. Every tree you hit, you could get leaves, vines, or branches. There’s no telling what you’ll get whenever you hit a resource…it’s all chance!

    Also, the inventory is ridiculously small. I’ve played this game many times over to see if I could get the hang of it. I eventually did, but I don’t think it made it any more fun to play. The key strategy is to set up structures bit by bit. First, make a hammer by combining 1 branch + 1 stone. Then, click on the hammer and put it in your hand. Right click to build an available structure. Putting the hammer in your hand and clicking repeatedly? You have to do it EVERY time you build something.

Okay, let’s build a shelter: 20 branches, 30 leaves. Since the inventory is ridiculously small, you’re going to hear your character complain: “It’s too heavy!” a lot. So, basically, build the structure piece by piece, meaning once you have the materials, click 50 times (20+30) on the structure, and then, you’ll have it. And that’s the easiest structure to get in the game. Food, water, and fatigue are all measured separately too, rather than Minecraft’s unified hunger meter, so you always have to keep an eye on that.

I respect that the game is based on survival, but does: “Click on this graphically pre-determined structure, while clicking wildly on this tree to see if you can get materials to build the graphically pre-determined structure” sound fun? No, not to me; it’s tedious, and just reminds me I could be playing Minecraft. Minecraft at least let’s me take pride in what I build, because the buildings’ designs are up to me.

And before any Stranded II fans chime in, yes, I built the wood and stone storage. But, I found that, again, the inventory is so small, that I kept having to sacrifice food to carry back logs for the all purpose storage hut. Otherwise, “It’s too heavy!” And I would find that my dropped food would perish after a while, or else I’d just lose track of where I put it.

Now, to make matters worse for non-German speakers, I kept finding bits of the game that were untranslated even in the English version. These were mostly ok. “Alle” means “all” for taking all the materials in front of you. “Eingeborener” means native, as you will sometimes encounter natives. But, there was one German message where, if I didn’t speak German, I’d be toast: “Feuer! Feuer! Ein Gebäude brennt!” In English: “Fire! Fire! A building is burning!” I’d built my shelter too close to my campfire (10 branches+50 stones) and it burnt down.

 Overall, I had some fun with this game. Hunting animals, seeing how long I could survive. But, there are too many random elements in Stranded II, and the building process is way too tedious for my taste when gathering is so difficult to measure and at the same time I have to maintain supplies, and even sometimes avoid lions. Yes, lions. Now, click faster, before they kill you!

I’m posting this to prove a point about disability in gaming. Previously, I lambasted Minecraft for having nearly impossible controls. But, it was still kind of fun to build with, truth be told. But, Stranded II is proof that a game can be perfectly accessible control-wise, and still be bad. Even though most of Stranded II is controlled by simple point-and-click, other problems make the game pointlessly tedious, and the fun dies quickly. Sometimes fun transcends disability issues: If a game’s bad, a game’s bad.

FINAL GRADE: C

ACCESSIBILITY GRADE: B+ (Point-and-click for nearly all actions; some untranslated words, clicking to build gets tiresome.)

FORGIVENESS FACTOR: E (Resource management is incredibly critical; limited inventory space makes survival difficult.)

 CONTROL A-:  (Nearly all interactions are point-and-click; controls can be changed in the main menu.)