Orion Trail (2015):

Orion Trail (2015):

“Dare to travel the absurd and dangerous Orion Trail, where only the luckiest, bravest, and most stubborn captains will make it all the way to the end. Become famously incredible or incredibly dead in this single player choose-your-own-space-adventure!”

The Star Trek parody game that mixes Oregon Trail with board games, and...well, Oregon Trail mechanics. The name of the game here is funny stuff happening. You start off by selecting 4 crew members (Officers) who will influence your stats (Diplomacy, Bravado, Tactics, Science, and Attack.) From there the game takes on resource management mechanics (Crew, food, fuel, and hull.) and works like a board game.

Each space you “move” takes fuel and food. Sometimes you'll have random encounters that will add or take away skills and resources (Lost your lucky underwear -1 Bravado. Took a martial arts class +1 attack, etc.) The meat of the game however is funny encounters when you get to planets. Whether it's dealing with annoying party aliens or the villainous “Underbaker”. Each scenario gives you a choice of how to proceed, with each solution using a stat.

For example, if you're dealing with the Underbaker, the attack solution is to blast him. The dialogue solution is to get him to cut a deal with you, the tactical solution is to get him talking, and disable his bakery, and the bravado solution is to steal his chef hat. Each one of these then turns into a probability out of 10. So, if you have 6 bravado, or whatever, 6 squares will be ok, 2 will be failure 1 will be complete failure and another will be complete success. Of course, the higher your stats, the more chances you have for success.

So, the game is all resource management and probability with comedy mixed in. Some of the events parody Star Trek directly like evil clone planets, and some parody other elements like Rogue AI, or a planet full of Michael Jackson Thriller zombies. Willy Wonka's factory and giant space malls are also part of it. Just make sure not to get lost in the giant space mall.

The goal of the game is to reach the space station at the end, where you receive your title based on how many successes or failures you had, and what stats you most used. For example, mostly successes will earn you the adjective “Admirable ____” So, if you used bravado, you'd be “Admirable Rule-Breaker”. Or “Unfortunate Scientist” if you used mostly science and got failures.

There are 6 missions (boards) to use, each one harder and longer than the next. I mostly like this game, since the emphasis is on probability and funny stuff rather than skill. I can always have a good time, even if my resources run out and we all die, at least it'll be funny. The same stuff kind of happens on every board, you get used to it after a while. But, there's enough random elements to keep me coming back. Check it out!

Cards and Castles 2 (2023):

Cards and Castles 2 (2023):

“Collectible cards spring to life in this wacky Tactical CCG. Assemble a deck to challenge your friends and rivals, and engage in glorious CARD BATTLES! Will you choose fearsome dragons, or the deadly squirrels?”

This game is a collectible card game (CCG) that is all about using a cutesy and funny art-style for a war-based card game. It reminds me a little bit of Card Wars from Adventure Time. There are 6 factions. Vikings, Ninjas, Undead, Bestial, Thieves and Heroes. The Vikings can summon berserkers, land sharks, and war penguins, among others. The forces of Nature (Bestial) can summon Archers, Trees, and battle squirrels. It's all about being silly and weird.

But, the game isn't without strategy. I still haven't really built a good deck up yet. Sometimes you can build buildings that give cards more health or attack. Or if you're the Ninja or Thieves faction, you can set traps so that when your castle is attacked, it hurts the other player. The object of of the game is to destroy the other player's castle.

As with most of these deck-building games, there comes a point where it just comes down to luck of the draw and how powerful your cards are, but that's how they draw you in. You might be doing good one minute and then someone draws a card that destroys everything in your deck. That's just how these games go. A cutesy art-style can only mask so much grinding.

I'm not a fan of huge grinds in games, so I usually just stick with the Vikings so far, unless I'm completing a mission that calls for another faction. They can use Dwarven weapons and armor, and have good heroes, like some guy named Björn. Plus, they're the first faction you start with, so it's easier for me just to start there and build outward.

Look, I wish I could say I liked the game more, I'm not against the “Git Gud” philosophy, but there's too much grinding for my tastes. Single-Player Quests are ok, even a bit challenging. After a while, you're either too overpowered for Single-Player, or too under-powered for multiplayer. But, as I said, I still haven't really built up a good deck. I can't really recommend it, but if you don't mind the grind, check it out.

Leave Mr. Bear Alone (2023):

Leave Mr. Bear Alone (2023):

“A Visual Novel about a bear that kinda just wants to be left alone.”

Leave Mr. Bear Alone is a funny visual novel designed by one guy. It's a short one. Reportedly, it's 500 words. The only way to win is to leave Mr. Bear alone. But, the catch is to read more of the story, you have to follow Mr. Bear. So, he gets more and more annoyed, until you lose.

You see, whenever you choose not to follow Mr. Bear, you win. But, the story ends. It'd probably be a good party game or prank game. It takes about 20 minutes. You can follow Mr. Bear through the lake, to his house, or throw a party in the woods for Mr. Bear...but he really wants you to leave him alone.

Give it a try. It's not too long. But, you're gonna lose a lot. Mr. Bear really wants to be alone. Don't follow him. He's gonna be mad. This is pretty funny. Mr. Bear will say things like “Oh, you just COULDN'T LEAVE ME ALONE!” Make a party game of it, and see who can follow the longest. At least it's funny.

Doki Doki Literature Club! (2017):

Doki Doki Literature Club! (2017):

"Hi, Monika here! Welcome to the Literature Club! It's always been a dream of mine to make something special out of the things I love. Now that you're a club member, you can help me make that dream come true in this cute game! Every day is full of chit-chat and fun activities with all of my adorable and unique club members: Sayori, the youthful bundle of sunshine who values happiness the most; Natsuki, the deceivingly cute girl who packs an assertive punch; Yuri, the timid and mysterious one who finds comfort in the world of books; ...And, of course, Monika, the leader of the club! That's me! I'm super excited for you to make friends with everyone and help the Literature Club become a more intimate place for all my members. But I can tell already that you're a sweetheart—will you promise to spend the most time with me? ♥"

So, this is actually a creepy anime that pretends to be a high school romance game until its horror elements are slowly revealed. There's a girl that commits suicide, a girl who slowly wastes away, a girl who's totally into stabbing, and a girl who takes over your game until you delete her character file. Once you know it's actually a horror game, (Spoiler alert.) the joke wears off really quickly, and you just click through all the forgettable dialogue to get to the next girl. Can't recommend.

ONE PUNCH MAN SEASON 1 (2015):

ONE PUNCH MAN SEASON 1 (2015):

“The story of Saitama, a hero that does it just for fun and can defeat his enemies with a single punch.”

One Punch Man is something I've wanted to talk about for a long time, because it's so good. It's a comedy shonen. Usually, shonen are just about POWER GUYS who want POWER because POWER is good, so they quest to get more POWER. Here, Saitama already has ultimate power and is just doing the hero thing for fun. That's what makes it very fun and relaxing to watch, despite its action-packed shonen backdrop.

Early on in his hero career, he trains so hard he becomes bald. That's his origin. After that, he can knock out enemies with one punch. He even makes some enemies with the heroes from the Hero Association who are jealous of him. These make all the fights in Season 1 hilarious. The villains and other heroes talk a big game, and then it's over in one punch.

But, he doesn't just make enemies. While fighting a giant mosquito lady, Saitama befriends a cyborg Genos, who's training to become a hero. Saitama takes him on as a disciple. Then, One Punch Man takes out the “House of Evolution”, Hammerhead's "Paradiser Gang", and some others like “Speed o' Sound Sonic", who is a ninja. Eventually, Genos convinces Saitama to join the Hero Association, so he can have fans. From there, he passes the physical exam with flying colors while completely forgetting the oral test!

After multiple heroes struggle to take out the “Sea King”, One Punch Man arrives leisurely. After he punches him out, some kids and heroes start to claim that Saitama is a phony, or a job poacher. From there, the anime becomes a weird alien invasion story. Their leader Ouroboros has a heavily armored spaceship, and about 5 “final forms” of armor. Of course, the only thing Saitama really fights is boredom. He just says “Ok.” after Ouroboro's villain monologue. But, he has to break out his “finisher”: Serious Punch!

Even after all that, Saitama finds that most the aliens are good. So, he keeps to his apartment and lets them hang around. The reason I like Season 1 is it tells a pretty chill, self-contained story which is pretty much the opposite of your average self-serious, meandering action shonen. That alone makes it funny. The next seasons are about the arrival of the Hero Hunter villain Garou, and a tournament arc, with the ending teasing the arrival of the Monster Association. These are good, and deliciously self-depreciating, but nothing really compares to that first season.

One Punch Man is always looking for a good fight, but can never find it. Despite this, he's never boasting or talking himself up. He battles boredom, and gets excited for simple things like clearance deals on food. That's pretty much the entire joke. Some people hate that kind of humor, but I loved it. I haven't seen a shonen quite like it. If you've got a chance, definitely watch it. It's one of my favorites, and free on Hulu.

Freaked (1993):

Freaked (1993):

“A vain actor, his best friend, and an activist end up at a mutant freak farm run by a weirdo scientist.”

It's sort of a weird Dr. Frankenstein meets Garbage Pail Kids gross-out comedy all wrapped in an early 90s MTV aesthetic. A salesman (Ricky.) goes to sell illegal fertilizer called Zygrot-24 from EES (Everything Except Shoes.) but ends up captured by a mad scientist (Dr. Skuggs.) and turned into a weird tumorous beast boy. His girlfriend and his best friend, Julie and Ernie, are combined into a Siamese twin. Then, they meet companions and plot their escape from the doctor.

Most of the humor comes from the grotesque freak designs. But, there are moments where it's like each scene is its own little parody. After being told to make the most of his freak form by his friend Worm, Ricky launches into a soliloquy from Shakespeare's Richard III, with subtitles for the “culturally illiterate”. There's even a Hollywood Squares bit that introduces Ricky's new friends including Ortiz the Dog Boy (Keanu Reeves), Worm, a giant worm man, Cowboy, a literal anthropomorphic cow, the Bearded Lady (Mr. T in a dress.), and Sockhead, who has a sock puppet for a head.

Now, EES comes in as soon as the freaks try to make their escape. Their plan is to make Americans more productive by turning them into freaks with more arms, hands, and no mouths to talk back. At the same time, Dr. Skuggs plans to turn Beast Boy Ricky into a super mega freak dedicated to evil, who will kill his friends to make room for more freaks. And then an amusement park!

It's definitely not a pretty movie to look at, but it does have comedic moments if you're in a gross-out irreverent headspace.In my favorite bit, Dr. Skruggs falls into a vat of Zygrot-24 and becomes the ultimate freak...a talk show host! You're definitely gonna need snacks for this one to enjoy it, but otherwise you can skip it! Don't say I didn't warn you, but you can watch the whole thing free on YouTube if you dare!

Young Frankenstein (1974):

Young Frankenstein (1974):

"An American grandson of the infamous scientist, struggling to prove that his grandfather was not as insane as people believe, is invited to Transylvania, where he discovers the process that reanimates a dead body."

Here's something a little different. It's a comedy-horror from Mel Brooks. A young Dr. Frankenstein (pronounced Frankensteen at first.) tries to avoid his grandfather's legacy of creating monsters. But, finds himself drawn back in when he receives an invite to Frankenstein's castle in Germany.

Much of the humor here is physical comedy and wordplay. “Walk this way!” Igor (pronounced EYE-gor) the hunchback says, and Dr. Frankenstein starts walking like him. Later, when they dig up a brain Igor picks up an “Abby Normal” brain. Frankenstein shows off his creation in a silly dance number that always cracks me up.

Then, when he's booed and starts being chased by the mob, the doctor decides to switch brains with the monster (for reasons given through adult innuendo.) The monster gains his intellect, and the doctor gains the monster's enormous...body parts. (To the surprise of his beautiful assistant Inga, played by Terri Garr.)

You have to give credit to everyone in this movie, but it wouldn't be the same without Gene Wilder as Young Frankenstein. He can go from cold man of science to raging maniac in a second, proclaiming such lines as “My grandfather's work was doo-doo!” with the utmost gravitas. Anyway, if you have time this spooky season, give this classic a watch. It's great fun!

OUL's The Producers and German Accent Training

A few days ago, I saw The Producers as performed by O.U.’s drama club in Lancaster. I bet you didn’t know I was an accent trainer! Well, neither did I! Back in April, someone from the drama club e-mailed me and wanted to know if I’d train him in a German accent for the role of Franz Leibkind in The Producers. I had about 15 hours working with him, 1 hour each time, and we aimed for a Bavarian accent, which I approximated, and he imitated flawlessly!

    I was amazed at the production. I went to the last show, and they performed their hearts out for a full musical. My client did well and maintained the accent. The show was funny, and of course there were two levels of performance you have to maintain; exaggerate for humorous effect and yet keep the accent authentic. Especially because it’s a funny Nazi stereotype like Franz Liebkind. It’s a hard job to do and I give the guy credit for learning all he did in such limited time!
 
 I enjoyed the show! I was impressed by all the cast, and even more surprised that some were just out  of high school! They served little treats…cupcakes and cookies, at intermission! I’m so proud of all the work my client did. It just goes  to show a little cultural knowledge  goes a long way, and you can have fun with learning a new language/culture too! Mel Brooks does parody, so you can also teach the accent in a parody-type matter.

    I spoke with the actor afterwards who said that he couldn’t of done it without me, which was nice. The cast was energetic, and met people afterwards! I suppose old dogs can learn new tricks! I’ve only had one semester of German linguistics, but maybe my personal contacts with Germans paid off! It was a fun production, and I’m glad I contributed! My congratulations to all the cast and crew! I sure had a blast!