I saw the “Mario movie”. It was ok. I mean, I knew it was gonna just remind me of a giant easter egg hunt. But like, parts of the videogame "world" are just other Nintendo games, and Bowser is invading on a flying island. It reminded me of Ready Player One, but funny. But I understand why DK fans didn't like it, because the Kongs are jerks.
It's not that the Kongs don't matter though. It's really about Mario learning to be brave and discovering he's the hero, and yadda yadda. Standard kid's movie stuff. Princess is already brave, because girlboss feminism, but gets captured by Bowser anyway. Ultimately, I feel the same way about it as I do Ready Player One. It's cool, but afterwards there's a feeling of "Did I enjoy this, or was it all just dopamine from bright colors and references?"
Any favorite parts or memorable lines? Well, Bowser tries to hit on Peach, and keeps screwing up. That's pretty funny."I guess love can really make a turtle come out of his shell." One time, Mario says they don't drive on rainbows back in Brooklyn. Really, Jack Black is the part I liked best. I was really pleased with how much they leaned into the 1980s Super Mario Bros Super Show...the Brooklyn origins, the "real-world" commercial uses the Super Show Theme, and they get sucked down a pipe, just like in the show's old rap intro. Sadly, he doesn't “Do The Mario”.
I hear Nintendo wants to make this a Movie Universe. Like the Marvel movies. Which is fine. Anything successful these days becomes a Movie Universe, almost like a law. But, I think I'll need some time before I care about the next Nintendo movie. I'm just kind of dizzy from this one. Fun, but like a sugar rush. That said, I still kind of recommend it. It's a fun little ride. Give it a watch. Hunt down all the little easter eggs. Or just skip it, and go play Mario games.
“A young boy and a group of misfit friends embark on a quest to find a dark magic item of ultimate power before a diabolical tyrant can.”
In the land of Prydain, the fate of the world will be decided by a pig keeper! The Black Cauldron is about Taran, a young boy looking after a psychic pig. One day, Taran sees that the pig is acting strangely, and discovers that the evil horned king wants to use the fortune-telling animal to find an artifact that can summon undead warriors. Its name is the Black Cauldron.
Along the way, Taran discovers some friends: Gurgi (a Gollum-like creature who steals things.), a bard (Fflewddur), a fairy, and a princess (Eilonwy), who can use magic. He even finds a magic sword while confronted by the evil king's henchmen. Then, Gurgi bravely throws himself into the Black Cauldron to stop the emerging skeleton army. Later, as part of a bargain with witches, Taran trades the magic sword in order for Gurgi to return to life.
I enjoyed this movie a lot. I might be a bit biased because it reminded me of something like a Dungeons and Dragons campaign, and I like DnD. You've got your standard DnD party (Fighter, Healer, Magic User, Thief.) and they all are on a quest to stop an evil king. I love a good fantasy adventure. Plus, Gurgi really reminded me of Gollum, from Lord of The Rings.
So, I'd recommend this movie if you like both those things. Some neat little additions too, are the voice acting from the late greats Freddie Jones and Nigel Hawthorne! Definitely watch this one on Disney+, if you have time. It's a classic fantasy adventure!
“The story of the legendary British outlaw is portrayed with the characters as humanoid animals.”
Well, I never thought I'd be reviewing this classic. So, here I go! It's the tale of Robin Hood, as seen through the animal kingdom. Robin Hood is a fox, Little John's a bear, and the whole thing is told by a rooster. Prince John is a power-hungry maneless lion, bent on taxing the poor, and living a rich lifestyle.
But, Robin Hood robs from the rich and gives to the poor. We first see this when he and Little John disguise themselves as female fortune tellers, but Prince John lets them in, because: “Female bandits? What next?” Then, when the rabbit Skippy has a birthday party, Robin Hood stops by and gives him his hat and bow. Well, he gets into some trouble as he shoots an arrow in Prince John's court.
Maid Marian checks on Skippy, and from this, the haughty Prince John and Sir Hiss get the idea to lure Robin Hood out with an archery contest (But, not before getting robbed again!), and then by kidnapping Friar Tuck! Robin Hood enters the contest disguised as a giant stork, fake beak and all. Clever!
After winning the tournament and Maid Marian, Robin Hood is found out, Friar Tuck is captured by the wolf Sheriff of Nottingham, and all looks to be lost until Robin Hood and Skippy's friends organize a jailbreak. (In disguise of course, this time as the dumb vulture guard Nutsy.) He fights the Sheriff and then disposes of Prince John for the actual king, Richard The Lion-Hearted. In this version, of course, he's an actual lion. Maid Marion and Robin Hood get married, and it all makes for a good lighthearted kid's movie.
A few notes before I recommend this one. There's some reused animation that's from the Jungle Book (1967). Most notably, during the dance number. The whole thing is (Oodalalee!) after all, a musical. But, other than that, the voice acting is good (Sir Hiss the snake and Prince John sure ham it up together.), the hand-drawn animation is nice, and I found it fun to re-visit, years later. I hadn't seen it since I was a kid, and I thought it holds up. Give it a watch on Disney+!
“When the world is threatened by an ancient evil, the four adolescent turtles must reunite and overcome their faults in order to stand against it.”
I have no idea why someone thought it was a good idea to make a Ninja Turtles movie take place after they defeated Shredder. Part of it takes place in Central America. You have hundreds of villains, characters, and plots to choose from in the TMNT universe. What they decided was to use a standard villain named Winters, and slowly introduce Dimension X, while back in NY, the turtles struggle with menial jobs.
Leo disappears to Central America to learn how to be a better leader...or something. Raph is a superhero vigilante called Night Watchman. Mikey becomes a party clown. Donatello lands a job in IT. It's kind of fun...for a one-off joke, not bringing together the whole team for the entire run-time.
Anyway, monsters start appearing in NY thanks to Winters and a Central American tablet which makes a portal appear. Stone soldiers and mutants start attacking. This is just about the only good fight scene we get with all the turtles fighting as a team. The rest of the movie is them rescuing Leo from the monsters.
It does have a few redeeming qualities. There's a fight scene between Raph and Leo. That was pretty good. The voice actors are pretty good. Patrick Stewart is Winters. Chris Evans is Casey Jones. Mako plays Splinter. It's free on Netflix, but absolutely skip this one, since it's trying to set up franchise sequels we know never happened. I think there was a videogame, but otherwise what a waste of some good ideas.
“On a journey to find the cure for a Tatarigami's curse, Ashitaka finds himself in the middle of a war between the forest gods and Tatara, a mining colony. In this quest he also meets San, the Mononoke Hime.”
Prince Ashitaka has to stop an evil demon plague from taking over the forest, and his arm. Meanwhile, there's a war brewing between animals and humans. Some people want to destroy the forest spirit. (Mononoke means “forest spirit”) Some want to destroy the humans, and some want to destroy the animals, and let technology grow unrestrained.
Ashitaka wants to bring balance between nature and humans. But, he's got all these obstacles in his way. Luckily, he gains an unlikely ally in San, the human princess raised by the Wolf Queen. He has to unite the animals and convince them to make peace, if it's even possible. Also, Lady Iboshi and her gun-wielding ladies of Iron City (Tatara) have hired a mercenary monk and others to kill the forest spirit.
Of all Hayao Miyazaki's films, this is definitely the most violent. There's tons of action, blood, and war. But, I feel it's all balanced out by the beauty of the Ghibli art style, and the ecological message. This is the anime I usually recommend to friends who are just getting into Miyazaki, since it's more like traditional anime, with the over-the-top level of action.
Of course, the real hero here is the art. It's all hand-drawn, the movements are all slow and human (As opposed to fast and exaggerated, as in other anime.) ,and it really lets you take in the awe of the forest, animals, and nature. As well as showing the horror of war, and the destruction technology can cause when unrestrained. The more the forest is off-balance, the more the evil plague grows. If you have time, it's a fantastic film. Definitely worth a watch. Check it out!
“On an alternate Earth, the Joker tricks Superman into killing Lois Lane, which causes a rampage in the hero. Superman decides to take control of Earth, Batman and his allies will have to attempt to stop him.”
Superman is tricked into killing a pregnant Lois, Metropolis blows up, and Superman loses his grip on humanity. Which is fine, when it exists to make Superman the bad guy in a fighting game. But here, it just makes him look really insecure. I suppose it's to show that he's slowly losing his innocence. First, he forces world leaders to sign treaties. Then, illegally imprisons protesting superheroes.
Like all narratives where Superman loses control, he eventually allies with villains; this time it's Ra's Al Ghul. Soon, he's eye-lasering children who are in harm's way to protest his rule. Some heroes die, and some villians too. But, it hardly reminds me of it's comic book/videogame counterpart. Batman hacks Cyborg. Nightwing is in there.
At first, it's cool when Superman goes crazy and shows his true powers. But after that, it's just him slowly becoming evil and killing/imprisoning heroes like a paranoid jerk. Harley Quinn goes good though, so that's kinda like the comics; pretty cool. And she knocks out Green Arrow. Mr. Terrific is pretty good in it, and I don't even remember him in the game.
Overall, it's pretty good, for what it lacks in plot. Where it tries to be high-minded, and address issues like freedom vs. security, I think it falls a little flat because...well, it's an action animation based on a fighting game comic book. (Red Son at least had alternate historical context to explore ideas.) They need to fight scenes, so it all just boils down to a fight. Enjoy it with snacks, maybe. But, once was enough for me.
“Batman and Nightwing are forced to team with the Joker's sometimes-girlfriend Harley Quinn to stop a global threat brought about by Poison Ivy and Jason Woodrue, the Floronic Man.”
Harley Quinn and Batman team up to stop Poison Ivy. Batman's former sidekick Nightwing finds Harley working as a waitress in a cosplay-based restaurant, and figures she knows where Ivy is. Harley says she wants to just live a normal life. Eventually they tickle each other, and decide to work together.
Now, usually the DC movie universe doesn't like to make fun of itself. But, this is a Harley Quinn comedy. So, it's much more slapstick and fart jokes than the usual Batman fare. I kind of liked it. They have fun. They sing karaoke before they find out where Ivy is, thanks to a tip.
Turns out, Ivy is in Louisiana working with Floronic Man to turn all life into plants. Harley pleads with Ivy, and is able to convince her to stop. But, she can't stop Floronic Man. She tells Batman that if he's just made of plants, they should be able to just burn him. (In comically whispered dialogue.) Nightwing and Batman kiss her cheek, and that's all folks.
It's pretty good for a DC animated movie. Especially for a DC comedy. You definitely have to be in the mood for this one. I don't know. Watch it with some snacks. Be prepared for fart jokes. If you like Harley Quinn, and have a good sense of humor, you should enjoy.
“What if baby Kal-El's rocket landed, not in Kansas, but in the Soviet Union? That is the premise of this Elseworld's tale from DC Comics.”
There's a lot going on here. This is an alternate world based on the 2003 comic by Mark Millar where Superman was raised in the USSR. He kills Stalin after he finds out about the gulags. He beats back capitalist Bizzaro created by the US with Lex Luthor. He defeats the Green Lanterns as they are recruited in the Cold War, and single-handedly wins the Korean War for the Communists.
So, in this world, Kal-El is still the same person. He still cares about helping people, only he believes the Soviet system is the way to do so. Even with his vast power, and big heart, he finds that he can't control people the way he'd like to in the name of equality. He fights Batman over this. In this version, Batman survives the gulag.
To add to the list of heroes making a cameo, he courts Wonder Woman on a diplomacy mission. Eventually, she withdraws when she finds out that with the help of Brainiac, he's been turning people into robots to make them more agreeable. Superman discovers that the villain soon can't be trusted. This leads to a showdown between Brainiac and US President Lex Luthor.
All-in-all, this is a fantastic showcase for a DC what-if scenario. The comic is a bit more detailed, but I highly recommend this one for a watch, however you can. It really shows the ability of comics and animation to transport us to other worlds. Plus, I like Jason Isaac's faux Russian accent. In Soviet Russia, Superman cartoon watches you!
"When a machine that allows therapists to enter their patients' dreams is stolen, all hell breaks loose. Only a young female therapist, Paprika, can stop it."
This magical tale centers on a revolutionary machine that allows scientists to enter and record a subject’s dream. After being stolen, a detective and brilliant therapist join forces to recover the device — before it falls into the hands of a “dream terrorist”. It really needs to be seen to be believed. There's a beautiful contrast here between dreams and mundane reality. Plus, many secrets the characters have are only expressed in dreams.
As the movie goes on, the dreams become darker and more surreal. People start talking nonsense and killing themselves. And eventually the nightmare visions infect reality. Only Paprika, who appears to be a happy-go-lucky therapist can stop them. Paprika's early scenes have a great sense of limitlessness and flight, in contrast to drab waking life, highlighting the theme of magical realism. Check it out, whenever you can!
"A practitioner of the deadly martial art "Hokuto Shinken" allies with two children and an expert in "Nanto Suicho-Ken" to fight against the rivals who kidnapped his lover and threaten the prosperity of mankind."
Popular, but strange! In a nuclear wasteland, you have Kenshiro, who can make people's heads explode by punching them. You have his brother, who can cut through people with his fingers and stole Ken's girlfriend.
Then, there's King Rao, who's raising an army across the wasteland to stop some kids from planting seeds. On top of all this bonkers fighting, there's some classic memes here too. Watch it if you can.
"A father tells his son a bedtime story about young Oblio (Mike Lookinland), who believes that having no point in the fantastical kingdom of pointed heads and things, still has a point."
Weird musical-ish adventure movie with Ringo as Narrator. A boy on a quest to find himself. He has no point on his head, but everyone else has a point. Check it out if you can! Free on Tubi. Groovy!
"A rag doll that awakens in a postapocalyptic future holds the key to humanity's salvation."
In an alternate 1930s world, a scientist is ordered by his dictator to create a robot in the apparent name of progress, and so the scientist creates the B.R.A.I.N., a highly intelligent robot. Lacking a soul, it turns machines against humanity. As a last ditch effort, the scientist puts his soul into 9 ragdolls (called "stitchpunks") to stop the B.R.A.I.N. Check it out, it's wild!
Love, Chuuniyibo and Other Delusions The Movie: Take on Me (2018):
Chuuniybo is a condition described as “middle school 2nd year syndrome”; a youngster who believes they have magic powers. Yuta used to be a chuuniyibo, but has become a realist as high school is ending. His girlfriend is a full-blown chuunyibo who runs a magical girl club at their school, and goes by the name “Dark Lord Shingen”. Her name is Rikka. Yuta is “Dark Flame Master”.
When it’s announced that Rikka must join her guardian Tokka in Italy, Rikka and Yuta make plans to elope together. Yuta learns that Rikka has a mother in Hokkaido, so they plan to live with her. But Tokka and some of her magical girl classmates Dekimori and her assistant, are pursuing her, blackmailed by Tokka. This convinces Rikka of even further betrayal, and she pretend battles her friends with magic. Although she believes she is like a high-level RPG mage.
There’s a nice contrast here between magic and realism. Yuta doesn’t want to force Rikka to accept realism, because he thinks she’ll lose part of herself; she needs to see the world on her own terms. It’s really about how people are willing to make sacrifices for love. That love makes the world exciting. But there’s also a theme of growing and slowly accepting reality. Watch it if you get a chance.
"After landing the gig of a lifetime, a New York jazz pianist suddenly finds himself trapped in a strange land between Earth and the afterlife."
Soul is a trippy movie dealing with the meaning of life. The animation is bonkers, and there's a lot of transcendental happenings going on for what is marketed as a kids' movie. Unborn souls, lost souls, wild scenery, and a bodyswap with a cat. Check it out!
"On a post-apocalyptic Earth, a wizard and his faire folk comrades fight an evil wizard who's using technology in his bid for conquest."
Wizards is pretty weird. An evil wizard fights against hippie elves after he discovers Nazi film propaganda. A silent bounty hunter! Trippy visuals by Ralph Bakshi. It satirizes war, religion, and technology. Check it out.
"A glowing green orb - which embodies ultimate evil - terrorizes a young girl with an anthology of bizarre and fantastic stories of dark fantasy, eroticism and horror."
A series of loosely related sci-fi stories holds together this weird animated film. My favorite is the story of the cab driver. Worth it for the animation alone. If one story doesn't grab you, another will. Watch it any way you can.
"After being brutally murdered in a subway station, a teen boy awakens to find himself resurrected by a strange computer named Gantz, and forced to fight a large force of invading aliens in Osaka."
Okay, so when you die, what happens? Odds are, you wouldn’t think you end up in an alien hunting ground where if you kill 100 aliens, you come back to life. Or are you really dead? Or just abducted by sadistic aliens that make you hunt for entertainment in high-tech battle suits? But, you keep flashing back to high school. And there they think you’re dead. This is Gantz:O, and it’s a weird movie with more plot twists than I just described and plenty of over-the-top action. It's on Netflix, so check it out.
Iron Man and Captain America: Heroes United (2014):
Captain America: “That’s your problem, Stark. You never strategize.”
Iron Man: “It’s called thinking on your feet. Or in my case…boot jets!”
You were expecting Guardians of the Galaxy? No, not so soon. This is another CGI adventure in the vein of last year’s Iron Man and Hulk: Heroes United. I have two major problems with this movie. 1. There’s some slight mind control, and 2. The “Waking Life” -like CGI makes the characters’ mouths move funny. That said, it’s at least a good intro for Taskmaster. But, I still feel a little deceived by the title. A little.
You see, the movie sort of tricked me into thinking it would be mostly Cap and Iron Man. But, Taskmaster and Red Skull also feature in it. And that’s fine. Dr. Kruler was also in last year’s Iron Man & Hulk: Heroes United. As was Abomination. But, then, even in this movie…I mean, not to ruin it, but you’ve got some Hulk in here, too. There’s just way too 1-on-1 action for job that could’ve been handled easily by the two heroes. Taskmaster is there to fight Cap and Iron Man…while Hulk has an army to take care of!
There is some brief fighting between Cap and Iron Man, but it’s a spar. Plus, the capture and Hawkeying of Cap seems a little too familiar at this point. Give me something other than brainwashing. Although they pull it off nicely. The lesson lays itself on a little thick. Throwing in Hulk doesn’t exactly help the balance of the lesson either. If each hero is to learn something from another…then brainwashing one hero and completely throwing in another seems to defeat that purpose.
I know there’s a twist, but it didn’t need to be made. Iron Man still rubs off a little bit on Cap and vice versa. But, essentially this is no different from Iron Man & Hulk: Heroes United, maybe even with worse CGI. And it’s all kind of wrapped safely within the plot devices of 2012’s The Avengers. Still, it was an ambitious-looking movie, introducing Taskmaster and showing off Cap’s combat skills. But, if you want that, watch The Winter Soldier.
In my opinion, the more I think about this movie, the more I don’t like it. But, at least it’s only 70 minutes. Maybe it’s just a little too ambitious. I liked the voice acting, but most of the movie is just a retread, with stiff mouth movements and unnecessary Hulking out. If they’re going to call it anything, it should be called Iron Man, Hulk, & Captain America: Heroes United. I want to say it could’ve been good…but it’s too much and too sloppy for a 70-minute 3D feature. I’d give it 2/5 stars. And one Hulk for some reason.
Avengers Confidential: Black Widow & Punisher (2014):
Black Widow: Don’t kill them, Frank!
Punisher: I have no choice!
This movie could’ve been so cool, if it were an actual Punisher anime! Instead, it’s an excuse for Black Widow to have a romantic fling with the villain. It starts off kind of cool, where Punisher shoots up a whole room of weapons dealers. But, then, he’s reduced to a tagalong. I’m not kidding. That’s what Nick Fury basically says. You see, because the villain has mind control powers, he needed to have two agents around. And who ends up mind-controlled? Yeah…Punisher.
To the film’s credit, it does show that Black Widow can go toe-to-toe with Punisher. (Frank Castle). Their fights last about a minute each time…the second time he’s mind-controlled. You see, Punisher is on the heels of a weapons dealer named Kane. Who turns out to be the pawn of a lovesick SHIELD (Elias) Agent who steals SHIELD supersoldier tech to impress Black Widow. He is also the pawn of a Russian terrorist organization. Because that would impress her….invade New York.
Eventually, the Russians use Elias’s mind control to invade New York with supersoldiers. Much of the movie consists of Black Widow being lovesick with Elias. She can take down Punisher, yes, but is apparently weak in the knees over a random SHIELD scientist who she should’ve just taken down. At least Amadeus Cho is there, a child genius SHIELD Agent who creates a mind shield after Black Widow promises to kiss him. She’s Punisher with flirting abilities. Win-win!
And now that Russian supersoldiers are invading New York while Black Widow is being romantic and angsty, The Avengers show up to defend the city! This is one instance in the movie where I did like it better than the movies. Because it’s animation, they have the budget to have all the Avengers show up and do their jobs. Hulk, Iron Man, even Captain Marvel. After all, it is Avengers: Confidential. Gotta have Avengers show up.
In sum, I liked the movie. I liked that they were able to show that Black Widow can kick butt after she was kinda sidelined in The Avengers movie. Unfortunately, this leaves very little time to build up Punisher’s kick butt credibility. I mean, normally he has weapons that fire nukes! But, here he’s regulated to a Hawkeye-type role (I‘m calling it being “Hawkeyed”, from now on!) providing connections to the Russian terrorists, and then being mind controlled. It’s always mind control.
Mind control aside, I do think It’s a good action film, and they build up Punisher nicely in the beginning. I just wish more superhero movies actually used all their superheroes. Punisher really could’ve been anyone. Anyway, nice to see all The Avengers together in anime form. But, who the heck is Elias? Oh, well. At least Punisher gets some revenge in the end! Go see it! 3/5 stars from me! Worth a watch.
Again, if you haven’t played the game, this won’t make much sense…I’m sorry. I am more of a Final Fantasy III guy, anyway. The film starts off with a little girl narrating the events of Final Fantasy VII, the videogame. Ex: The evil SHINRA Corporation tried to suck power from the Earth and guarded itself with soldiers who just happened to have the same DNA as an alien who recently wanted to destroy the planet. Easy to follow, right?
So, now one of the ex-soldiers who saved the planet (Cloud) from another who realized he wanted to destroy the planet (Sephiroth) is being mopey about killing a girl. Everyone who’s played the game knows who that is. It was supposedly a big event in gaming. But, I’m not gonna get into that.
The moping is what I hated about the game, and what I hate about the movie, too. So, Cloud starts off being chased by a gang of thugs led by Kadaj; who is actually Sephiroth in vitro…you can tell by…oh, he looks exactly like Sephiroth, never mind. You can tell. So, Kadaj and his gang are hunting after Cloud, and keep asking him about “mother”. The alien.
The battle scenes and animation are awesome. When Tifa fights Loz in the church, it’s awesome. It even makes a funny reference to the game. Loz’s cell phone ringtone is the Final Fantasy victory music, which makes you think Tifa has defeated him. The motorcycle battles are fast-paced, explosion-filled and amazing. I don’t want anyone to think that I think this is a bad film. It’s just too loaded with fan references.
The battle scene in the city before Sephiroth “awakens” is basically one big fan show. First Barrett shows up, then Cid, then Vincent…here’s the thing, though. They don’t really need to be there. It’s just for the fans. Cloud could’ve fought Sephiroth basically on his own. Okay, Cid has an airship. But, none of that battle takes place in the airship. He just rescues Cloud once.
I apologize if the above paragraph makes no sense. But, that’s just the way the movie is. It just throws out fan references. The only battle that really matters (Although I can’t stress enough, all the battles look good!) is the final showdown when Sephiroth’s theme starts playing and he’s awakened, and storm clouds move in, and they fight it out. That was epic!
Okay, I should also mention the President Rufus Shinra is in a wheelchair. (Supposedly due to SHINRA exploding in the game.) and a bunch of kids have a sickness called geostigma, because the planet is angry. I have to protest here, because after Rufus tosses “mother”, he’s able to stand, and the kids are cured at the finale with holy water from the church Tifa keeps going back to. It sort of takes on a “love heals everything” tone. As a philosopher of disability, I find this ridiculous and ham-fisted. Terrible way to end! It never really drops the preachy tone (And of course, disabilities aren‘t allowed in happy endings.), either, and Cloud keeps moping about “Are sins ever forgiven?” like he forgot he’s a mutant super soldier with a huge sword.
Look, I know her (I’m not gonna say her name; everyone knows who it is, and if you don’t, you won’t get the “tragedy”! Heck, I don’t! And I was there!) death was supposed to be traumatic, but Cloud dealt with death ALL through the game. Really? And then, you wanna get preachy on me? Don’t even try. I was over her before she even stepped on screen. Years ago!
But, see, that’s the big problem with this movie. I mean, between the flashy battles and fan references, the characters don’t grow any, nor do they have sufficient reasons to be involved. They’re involved because they saved the day last time. (When Street Fighter did it…they fought because it’s a fighting game!) Maybe role-playing games are just too nuanced to be 2 hour movies.
So you see, it’s essentially a fan-made train wreck full of exploding eye-candy. And yet, it’s so eye-catching I couldn’t look away! 2/5 stars from me. Handled with a big grain of salt, and nostalgia for a videogame from 1997! Cloud echoes my sentiments exactly: “Stay where you belong (Final Fantasy VII!)... in my memories.” Sorry, I couldn’t find the English clip of Cloud vs. Sephiroth. My DVD actually had options for Japanese or English!
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